Payment, tipping and etiquette: the practical side
Good to know
Short answer: With Milan you pay at the start of the date, preferably in cash or otherwise with a Tikkie. There is no deposit, except a small one for long trips. You can cancel free of charge until six hours before; after a date there is no refund. Tipping is never expected. Simple courtesy, such as being on time and honest about who will be present, matters far more.
Why talk about money at all?
Money is the least romantic part of any booking, which is exactly why it is worth getting out of the way. When both people know how payment works, there is no awkward moment at the door and no lingering question during the date. This page explains how I handle it, and adds a few notes on etiquette that make things pleasant for everyone.
When and how you pay
You pay at the start of the appointment, once I have arrived and we have said hello. I prefer cash, because it is the most discreet: no transaction with a name on your bank statement. A Tikkie is also fine if that is easier. Please have the exact amount ready if you pay in cash; it saves fumbling for change.
I do not ask for a deposit for a normal date; only for long trips do I ask a small deposit. That protects you, too: you never send money to someone you have not met.
These amounts are all-in. A hotel room is not included; usually you book and pay for it yourself. Couples pay the same as a single client. Travel costs apply only to Zeeland, Friesland, Groningen and Drenthe, and we agree them in advance.
Cancelling and rescheduling
Plans change. You can cancel free of charge until six hours before the date; just send a short message. If you need to move the date, tell me as early as you can and we will find a new time. Cancelling later than six hours before is something I ask you to avoid, because by then I have usually set the time aside and started travelling.
If I ever have to cancel, I will tell you as soon as possible and offer an alternative.
No refunds after a date
Once a date has taken place, I do not give money back. That is not meant to be harsh. It is the reason I take preparation so seriously: we discuss your wishes, limits, location and length beforehand, so that what happens matches what you wanted. If something during the date does not feel right, say so straight away and we adjust or stop.
Should you tip?
No, tipping is not expected. My price is my price, and I set it so that I do not rely on extras. If you want to show appreciation, the most valuable thing is honest feedback, a kind message afterwards or, if you feel like it, a review on Kinky.nl. Those mean more to me than an extra note.
Some clients like to bring a small gift, or offer a drink or something to eat. That is a lovely gesture but never necessary. Please do not feel obliged.
Etiquette that makes a date better
- Be honest about who will be present. If a partner is joining, tell me in advance.
- Share your limits early. It is easier to plan around them than to discover them halfway.
- Let me know about the setting. Pets, parking, a doorbell that does not work, a hotel with a strict reception: small details help.
- Be on time, or tell me if you are not. I do the same.
- Respect privacy both ways. I never share anything about you; please do not share my messages or photos.
- Freshen up beforehand. I always arrive showered, and appreciate the same.
What you can expect from me in return
I arrive on time, discreet and well groomed. I use protection without exception, and I am regularly STI-tested. I only meet people aged 21 and over. I never push for more than we agreed, and I accept a no at any moment. Afterwards, I delete our chat if you ask me to. I have worked independently since 2023, alongside a regular job, and I speak Dutch, English and a little basic German.
Alcohol and other substances
A glass of wine to relax is fine. Being drunk or under the influence of drugs is not, for either of us. If I notice that someone is not in a state to make clear choices, I end the date politely. That is about safety and consent, not about judgement.
Communication after the date
You are welcome to send a message afterwards, whether to say thank you, share how you feel or plan another time. I do not send unsolicited follow-ups or offers. If you would like me to delete our conversation, just say so.
Paying in a hotel
In a hotel, payment works the same way: at the start, once I am in the room. You do not need to involve reception at all, and I never ask staff anything about you. The room itself is your booking and your bill; it is not part of my price. If you pay the hotel in advance online, there is nothing visible at check-out that has anything to do with me.
Paying as a couple
Couples pay one amount, the same as a single client. How you divide it between you is up to you. I only need the total at the start of the date. If one partner arranges everything, that is fine; if you prefer to each pay half, also fine. A Tikkie can be paid from either phone.
Receipts and privacy
Because I prefer cash and only take a small deposit for long trips, there is usually nothing on paper. If you pay by Tikkie, the description can be something neutral. I keep no client records and do not store names or addresses after a date. If you would like our chat removed, I delete it on request.
A note on bargaining
My prices are already low and fixed, so I do not negotiate on them. That is not inflexibility; it is fairness to everyone who books. What you can always adjust is the length: if two hours does not fit your budget this month, one hour might. And if your plans change, cancelling up to six hours before costs nothing.
Small courtesies that are noticed
A few small things make a real difference. Replying to the confirmation message on the day, so I know the date is still on. Telling me if you are running late, or if the plan has changed. Letting me know where to park or how to find the right entrance. And being open during the date about what you enjoy and what you do not. None of this is required, but it helps the date go smoothly, and I try to offer the same courtesy in return: punctuality, clear messages and full attention once I am with you.
Etiquette, in the end, is simply mutual respect. When both people feel respected, the practical side disappears into the background and the date can be what it is meant to be.
Because I work without an agency, there is no commission on top, and I explain why that keeps my prices lower. If you are still at the stage of looking for the right male escort, that is completely fine too.
Frequently asked questions
Do I need to pay a deposit?
No. You pay at the start of the date.
Which payment methods are accepted?
Cash, preferably, or a Tikkie.
Until when can I cancel for free?
Until six hours before the date.
Is tipping expected?
No. A kind message or an honest review is appreciated, but never required.
Can I get a refund after the date?
No. That is why we agree everything beforehand.
Is the hotel included in the price?
No. You usually book and pay for the room yourself.
Can I pay part in cash and part by Tikkie?
Yes, that is fine, as long as the full amount is settled at the start.
What happens if I cancel within six hours?
Please avoid it, because the time has been reserved for you. Get in touch anyway; it is always better to tell me than not to show up.
Does Milan negotiate on price?
No. The prices are fixed and already low. You can choose a shorter length instead.
Still have a practical question?
Ask me before you book. I would rather answer ten questions than leave you unsure.